face to face.

" Myślę by zadzwonić wciskam pierwszą z cyfr

kilka lat życia mija, nim wybiorę drugą z nich

wszystko się przewija mija jak sekundowy film "

Tomorrow

I know, it's over cause tomorrow never brings me you again. It never gives me hope that everything is possible. The reality kills me, every day more and more. I remember almost all the words which mean : you've got only one life, you can do what you want etc. but I'm almost 20 and still don't understand the world.

greetings from...

' Somebody's gonna miss you,

Somebody's gonna wish that you were here '

This small city was going to give me something more which I really need and want to have. Why it didn't work at all too quickly? Why am I a girl which is better to stop talking with? What have I in my eyes or in my mind?

It's too hard to understand this point of view. I'm not very proud about yesterday but if it changes anything if I tell you I regret? Is there any sense to regret what I did? Probably I don't want to know.  Try to think in my way.

try to be bitch. really cold I have to try again cause last time it didn't work at all.

I'm empty inside and heart made from glass. the only things which I love are alcohol, my shade in the mirror and hip hop. No, I don't anybody at all - do you really think so ? Of, course. cause I'm blond, I suppose I'm perfect and everybody stares at me.

but today I fuck your opinion, it's weekend. World is strange so I fuck tomorrow.

Flashbacks....

I feel as a small girl even if I'm 20, study and have some job. Life makes me feel scared without you.

You were my prince from fairy tale- I remember the day in which I told you that. I know, I'll never find somebody like you,  so Adele lies in her song, it's impossible. You were the one who helped me changed shoes in front of the club and let me sleep in his bed, you were looking after me without any words from first while in which we met.

And today when 3 months has followed I still remember your words and way in which you were looking at me. I remember every single day which we spent together. You made me feel stronger, happier, proud about who I am and what I do. You made me believe that dreams come true... But where are you today? Do you play football match or you just lie in your bed, maybe you try to get rid of hangover after some party. 

But the thing which I'm sure you don't do is thinking about me, am I sure?

I wait for the day in which I will could take your hand once again. Maybe it will be stupid and I wait for it unnecessarily but it's almost all what I want. Of course, I want you back too.

Tears fall on my cheeks and touch the floor on which I sit. You don't realise how often it happens. If only I could forget about You when nobody's going to understand what I mean. If only I'm strong enough not to stare at your photo when the whole world is on my case. Just listen, a lot of coffeine doesn't help at all, nothing helps when I again dream about You. I was asking you not to appear in my dreams but I see you don't want to listen. There's nothing which could kill me more than dreaming about You.

silent

Please, look at me once again. Just for a while and try to understand. 

I still look at the sky when the day is going to over and talking to the stars if they can make my dreams come true. I just want to put the pieces together but the only answer from the stars is silent.